I have not updated for a while, I am struggling to read right now due to lack of concentration. I have set myself the challenge of working through a self-help book, even though I have not had much success with these in the past. Therefore it is proving difficult to keep motivated. The next ED book I plan to read is 'Fasting Girls: The History of Anorexia Nervosa.' But on a different note, here are some recent thoughts:
There is a theory that Anorexia and Bulimia are ‘two sides of the same coin.’ I think this has a lot of truth in it, but I would also add BED in there as well. There are so many people who have gone from one disorder to another, or picked up symptoms from all three and developed an atypical ED or EDNOS. I think it is wrong for professionals to see me as being recovered from anorexia, and that I developed Bulimia as a separate entity. I have talked to many others who have never lost their anorexic mindset even though their behaviours may suggest otherwise. I am now addicted to binge eating because as long as I don’t let it go, it guarantees that the anorexia cannot take over my body again. However, no amount of binge eating can drive the anorexia out of my mind. When professionals refuse to accept that my disorders have layered up rather than replaced each other, they are in danger of encouraging my anorexic thoughts. It is a balancing act; they need to treat the anorexia and bulimia/BED simultaneously until I finally meet balance. When I was a restricting anorexic I thought that Bulimia was the opposite. Now I know that they are the same monster which changes tactics in order to fool.
Happy Pancake day! Even though I don't celebrate this due to the food content ;)
- Durham, County Durham, United Kingdom
- (November 2010) > I am taking a year (or two) out of university to recover from an eating disorder; originally diagnosed as restricting anorexia 7 years ago, but has more recently morphed into BN non-purgeing type/ BED/ COE/ EDNOS / whatever you want to call it. I thought I would write a blog to give me a kind of project to work on, mainly giving an insight into the Eating Disorders books that I have read and any interesting articles/videos I find. However, there may be some updates on my life and thoughts once in a while. My quest is to understand these disorders, although I know the best I can do is to keep on researching xxx Update (2012): I have now returned to uni.
Pictures (not mine)
Tattoo one taken from: